book: the princessa

Do you want to be Machiavelli, or Machiavella? by Harriet Rubin

Harriet Rubin's book A prince, according to Machiavelli, is a man among men, a canny fighter, who takes what he wants out of life. The prince represents honour, whereas the notion of ‘princess’ has been a term of derision. Until now.

As Harriet Rubin puts forward in her book, ‘The Princessa, Machiavelli for women’, a princessa is the woman among women. Someone who understands that the ally of loving is fierce, that confrontation is the ally of peace and that bravery is the alley of vulnerability.

Machiavelli’s prince learned that, for the sake of power, it is better to be feared and respected than loved, as love might compromise his ability to be tough with others. But for Rubin’s princessa, love does not mean compromising; love is a strategy to sustain the fighter’s dream, in spite of stories people tell about the difference between dream and reality. The princessa doesn’t fear her enemy’s strengths, she uses them. She makes a war hers, but not to the exclusion of others. She makes her war other’s war too. Princessas believe that today’s enemy is tomorrow’s ally.

It is this strategy that is highlighted in the book, illustrated by the stories of historical figures such as Golda Meir, Joan of Arc, Madeleine Albright or Gertrude Bell. But it also inspires women to seek their own path, and their own story. ‘A princessa cannot afford to think of herself only as her ideas or her talent or her CV or a wallet for that one great suit. A princessa is a story’ says Rubin. She is a story whether she wants to be or not – because she is a woman. People watch women as if reading them – they watch them more closely than they watch men because they are more interesting.